Senior Citizens Share Their Sex Secrets With Jimmy Kimmel And They’re Probably Doing It More Than You

If the rising rates of sexually transmitted diseases in nursing homes over the past several years has been any indication, it’s apparent that senior citizens are having a lot more sex these days. The statistic was recently confirmed by a national sex study, so whether or not you care to think about your parents or grandparents getting it on, old people are having more sex than ever.

So inquiring minds want to know: what’s their secret? To get to the root of that question, Jimmy Kimmel sent a cameraman out to a notorious senior hangout, The Grove farmer’s market in Los Angeles, to survey senior citizens and find out how they keep things fresh in the bedroom. “A little vodka couldn’t hurt,” bluntly answered one woman, while another octogenarian admitted that she has a an 83-year-old boyfriend and that their sex life is “great.”

Props to argyle sweater-wearing homeboy 1:47 of the way into the segment for his candid honestly (even if it takes him a few tries), in confessing that when he was “on the bottom” he was a superman, but “on top, minuteman.” This guy f*cks. And so does the next, who says that his advice to other seniors boils down to “use it or lose it,” and he should know because he just got some from his wife earlier that morning.

You millennials could stand to learn a thing or two from these sexy old farts, is all we’re saying.

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