So this is pretty gross news. As 66-year old Paula Deen’s endorsement deals have been falling apart left and right – from Walmart and Target to Smithfield and, of course, the Food Network – there is apparently one industry that is not afraid to stand by the embattled celebrity chef who has been cast into the buttery void because she once used a very horrible word and planned a very, very horrible wedding reception. That industry? Porn, of course.
According to TMZ, your source for all things porn-and-food-related, the folks at Pure Mature have offered Deen a six figure deal just to appear in one of their niche videos.
In the letter, PM starts by explaining to Paula she’s a MILF — a hot mom over the age of 65 who men would like to (you know). It continues with the job offer adding, “Full figured or thin, arthritic or diabetic — you embody our perfect spokesperson.”
As for compensation, PureMature says it’s willing to offer her “6 figures for very little work” … and NO nudity is required. Phew.
Okay, first of all, let’s pump the brakes on this definition of MILF, people. A hot mom over the age of 65? I’m pretty sure that’s outside the MILF realm. I don’t think that Paul Finch looked at Stifler’s mom and thought, “Damn, I wonder if she’s got any grandkids.” But maybe age ranges are different in the mature ladies porn genre, so I won’t judge it too harshly.
As for the offer, six figures for no nudity? I’m assuming that she’d have to at least appear in lingerie or something for that kind of coin, but maybe Pure Mature has something a little more kinky in mind. Either way, I’d like to offer some suggestions for titles, if I may:
Deen on Peen
Food Netwerk (it’s a sexy dance video)
Ready, Set, Cook, Have Sex!
Paula’s Sex Party
Paula’s Breast Dishes
Top and Bottom Chef
Paula Deen Loves James Deen (he might need 7 figures)
66 Going on 69
And my personal favorite…
I Can’t Believe It’s Not Baby Batter
