Seth Meyers’ Descriptions For ‘Lost Grandpa’ Trump’s Post-Presidency Life Are Bluntly Accurate

After George Washington’s two-term stint as president ended, he got into the whiskey-making business. Theodore Roosevelt traveled to the jungle; George W. Bush took up dog paintings; and Barack Obama made a podcast with Bruce Springsteen. Donald Trump, meanwhile, has chosen to spend his post-presidency life “creepily shuffling around his Palm Beach resort, like the ghost of a retired dentist who drowned in a water hazard on the 18th hole,” as Seth Meyers put it during Monday’s episode of Late Night. Also, he could face sedition charges. Dog paintings are sounding good right now…

After making fun of Trump for wearing the same outfit every day — “red hat, white Polo, slacks that seem to be rising faster than the sea level” — and comparing him to a “lost grandpa who’s supposed to be watching the kids at the mall,” Meyers took a “Closer Look” at the former-president’s finances. Trump’s net worth fell by a reported $700 million while he was president, the Manhattan DA is investigating his tax returns, and his beloved Mar-a-Lago resort recently closed due to a COVID outbreak. “My god. COVID follows this guy like a rain cloud following Daffy Duck,” the host said. “His rallies, the White House, now Mar-a-Lago. He’s like a walking COVID test. If you’re ever in physical proximity to Donald Trump, you should quarantine for two weeks just to be safe.”

Trump is a “financially broken ghost criminal,” the “coughing swamp joke of Palm Beach,” Meyers continued, who’s now the “color of spackle” with a broken plane. On the bright side, at least his wax statue isn’t getting punched and clawed anymore.

You can watch the Late Night clip above.