Still haven’t seen HBO’s Going Clear? Don’t bother. SNL condensed everything you need to know about Scientology into one music video from the 1990s about Neurotology, a made-up, spaced-out religion that requires a billion year contract. It’s damning and clever, with the framing device allowing viewers to see where the singers are up to 25 years later. Most are missing, some have written tell-alls, while others are straight-up dead, having been “thrown off a boat.”
Scientologists are pissed they didn’t think of chaining Katie Holmes to a toilet.