If Wilson Fisk From ‘Daredevil’ Was A Waiter In A Restaurant

10.23.18 6 Comments


A young couple is seated at a table in a nice restaurant. They’ve heard great things about it but knew it was a little out of their price range. It is their third anniversary, though, and they are deeply in love and want to splurge. As they look at their menus, they notice a giant hulking bald man approaching the table. It is Wilson Fisk from Daredevil. He is their waiter.

WILSON FISK: Hello, my name is Wilson and I’ll be your waiter tonight. Can I start you off with something to drink?

MAN: I’ll have a glass of Cabernet.

WOMAN: Make that two, please.

WILSON FISK: Excellent. And are we interested in any appetizers tonight?

MAN: Hmm. We were thinking about sharing the beef carpaccio.

WILSON FISK: I killed a rabbit when I was a boy. It belonged to my neighbor, Timmy. I had no particular animus for Timmy or the rabbit. It was a violent act borne of opportunity and curiosity. The rabbit was in a small cage in the garage and the garage was open. Timmy’s father was working on the family car, a brown station wagon. I entered when he went inside to get a glass of lemonade. Without a word, I slit the rabbit’s throat with a pocket knife and began consuming its flesh. There’s something primal about eating raw meat. Something that’s makes you feel… worthy of being at the top of the food chain. It’s invigorating. The beef carpaccio will make you feel… alive.

MAN: … okay…

WILSON FISK: Terrific. I’ll put that in now and be back with your wine shortly.

[Fisk leaves]

WOMAN: What the hell?

MAN: Jesus Christ.

WOMAN: I’m very uncomfortable now.

MAN: Do… do you want to leave?

WOMAN: I do but… it took so long to get a reservation. And we’re here now. Let’s just try to stick it out?

MAN: If you want….


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