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Archie Is Going To Be Shot Dead This July. Yeah, That Archie.

By / 04.08.14
LifeWithArchie_36_Magazine

Archie Publications


Archie Publications has, in recent years, gotten smart with the books they put out. Afterlife With Archie takes what should be a dumb idea, Archie fighting zombies, and makes it a disturbing, even sad, book. They’ve tackled issues ranging from the Occupy movement to same-sex marriage. And now, they’re going to kill Archie.

No, it won’t be in “Violent Murder Double Digest”, it’ll be in the actually quite good series Life With Archie. This particular book has been getting critical acclaim because the Riverdale crew have to grow up, get jobs, and deal with life. It goes in some smart directions and is genuinely worth a read.

But all books must end, so they’ve decided, to hell with it, Archie’s going to get two in the gut. Here’s what the press release from Archie had to say about murdering their most beloved character and company mascot in cold blood:

The iconic comic book character, beloved by millions around the globe for over 70 years, will sacrifice himself heroically while saving the life of a friend. “We’ve been building up to this moment since we launched LIFE WITH ARCHIE five years ago, and knew that any book that was telling the story of Archie’s life as an adult had to also show his final moment,” said Archie Comics Publisher/Co-CEO Jon Goldwater.

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Aaaaand then we’re going to have four different Archies come back from the dead: A snotty teenager, a Black guy in power armor, a cyborg, and some douche with wraparounds. Then the cyborg will turn out to be evil and blow Riverdale off the map.

Or maybe they’ll just end the series. Either way, expect people to mistakenly believe Archie will head in a new, gritty direction this summer; the news reports promise to be highly entertaining.


TAGSarchiedead meatnot a hoax

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