Teddy Ruxpin was easily one of the most nightmarish toys to come out of the 1980s. Although Cabbage Patch Kids rank pretty highly as well (and don’t even get me started on those Island of Doctor Moreau-esque abominations, the half-kid half-animal “Koosas”), Teddy Ruxpin was one of the few “trendy” toys that I absolutely did not understand as a kid. I did not own a Teddy Ruxpin, nor did I have any desire to own a Teddy Ruxpin.
Nothing to see here, just an animatronic bear that horrifyingly moves its mouth and eyes when you cram a cassette tape into its back — no cause for alarm! So when kids of today are first introduced to a Teddy Ruxpin, at first they’re not too put off by the somewhat cute and unassuming-looking bear. Until it opens its mouth, that is. A couple of the kids are like, “Oh, this is cute!” The others, on the other hand, have the much more appropriate Michelle Tanner-approved reaction: