There are few things in life I love more than a good “stranger danger” video, especially one from the late 1980s, early 1990s, and Redditor sdude9 might have found the best one yet. It’s got everything a good video teaching children to run away from adults should have: cheesy effects, condescending narrator, a creepy-looking cast who kids probably ran away from even before this video, one hot lady with a Game Boy, a general distrust of people, and a man threatening to kill a little girl’s puppy. Let’s meet the strangers, shall we?
Well, she’s hot, and hot people are never evil.
Resting your elbow outside a car window implies that you’re too chill to want to abduct.
What kind of a monster wouldn’t help a guy find his dog?
I LOVE FUN.
I’ve seen Mrs. Doubtfire enough times to know that that’s a man in drag. He probably just wants to play dress-up and dance with a vacuum to Aerosmith songs.
This guy clearly spends his time color coordinating his outfits, not thinking how he can nap a kid.
Er, yeah, he may not be trustful.
Um…I might think about running away, screaming “CREEPY MAN CREEPY MAN,” if I saw this guy.
HIS HEAD IS GIGANTIC.
“If you tell anyone about our little secret, I’ll kill your dog.” RUN YOU STUPID KID RUN