(Photoshop courtesy of Ufford)
As the internet’s number one source for Danzig stories, it is my sworn duty to bring you news of the latest Glenn Danzig debacle. Apparently, Danzig was booked to play at the Fun Fun Fun Fest in Austin over the weekend, a show that was supposed to be 90 minutes long and include songs from Danzig, Samhain, and The Misfits. He ended up playing an hour set that included only two Misfits songs. Onstage, Danzig blamed festival organizers for cutting him off early, and their Facebook page was flooded with angry comments from people who’d been promised more Misfits. Festival booker Graham then took to the page to give the Festival’s side of the story, and that’s where things get interesting.
“Hi. I book the fest. Those that are hating could NOT be more wrong. Yes, someone has your money and ripped you off. His name is Glenn. Stop by his house in LA with some kitty litter in trade for your refund, but we still had to pay him and he didn’t deserve it after what he pulled. Here is how it went down…check the timeline:
-Glenn flies in this morning and says he has a cold and doesn’t want feel like playing the show. he demands french onion soup and vitamins brought to his hotel suite. He wants to soup now and wants it hot. we get it.
-Glenn says it’s freezing in Austin and he can’t go on. says it’s going to be 28 degrees tonight and he won’t perform (keep in mind, it’s currently 71 and sunny with a night forecast of maybe 50+). He says we have to move the show/festival inside if we want him to play (obviously, that’s not possible).
-We rent stage heaters (no other bands, Public Enemy, MCD, Passion Pit, etc need or want heaters on stage…it’s warm up there and not cold out) for Glenn per demand, as well as bring in an onsite doctor to make him happy and be there if his cold doesn’t go away.
-Agents and Managers assure us he’s going to play now.
-Glenn’s band/crew arrive before him in the afternoon and load gear. They said it all works, they get up the Danzig banner, check lights, are happy.
-Glenn arrives at 7:45 (half hour before showtime, they go on at 8:15 exactly and have a 90 min set…park curfew by the city/police is 10pm sharp)…when he arrives, he says he’s not going to play. (He) Says he doesn’t like how the banners are hung on stage and doesn’t like the lighting or stage size (all this was advanced in email and phone well in advance and the band/crew loaded in mid day and were happy with it and said it would work…stage wasn’t small at all). He wouldn’t leave his trailer to go look at the stage, though, so the lighting company drew up specs for him to look at of the stage lighting 50 feet from his trailer and brought it to him to look over and prove him wrong.
-In the meantime, Glenn’s bodyguard gets pushy (literally) with Murder City Devils manager and tells them they can’t have their friends watch MCD from stage and wants them to cut their set. (Then) kicks them off stage and gets physical with the band and stafff….oh, also Danzig says he’s just as big as Slayer and Slayer is playing a bigger stage on Sunday and that’s bullshit and wants to play the same stage slayer is playing…or won’t play. makes him look bad.
-It’s now 8:15 and time for them to go on. The band is ready, corpse make ups done, guitars tunes. Glenn says he’s not playing and that it’s too cold outside. he said big stages should have windscreen so wind can’t blow on him from the side. The stage managers then goes and gets tarps and tarp the entire side of the stage so now wind will hit him.
-It’s now 8:40. we explain that it’s cutting into the set and he’s going to have cut the 90 min set if he doesn’t play soon, as park curfew is 10. He says he doesn’t feel like playing. says “I got a death bug. if i go on stage and get sick, I’ll die. I’m not getting sicker for this show” (NOTE: he totally looks and seems fine…no coughing, no paleness, no vomiting, just some balding and a gut, from what i can tell). We get the Dr. and he says he can do a b12 shot or anything he needs if he feels bad…Danzig says he only treats illnesses naturally, so won’t do that. We finally get him to agree to play and have already informed his crew that it’s only 60 mins (9pm at this point) and they start cutting some songs from the set list, so they can still do Misfits, but obviously didn’t cut enough.
-They went on almost and hour late due to the HANDS DOWN biggest rock star moment we’ve ever dealt with and then he tries to start a riot and blames the fest, the city, the cops and everyone, but himself. goes backstage and tries to fight a few ppl and get in the van and leaves.
The end…. we’re bummed too. we wanted to hear Skulls.”
At the very least, it’s nice to hear that there are still some rock stars in this world. As I was writing this post, I sent the story to a friend of mine, the guy who I think first introduced me to the Misfits, in fact, and I’m not even going to try to compete with his take on it:
Dude, don’t you think given his schtick that having a death bug would be, like, cool? Like he could get on stage and just cough and spit phlegm straight up in the air and have the band riff Halloween 2 while he’s like “I can feel it, the blackness inside me… Growing, feeding, multiplying… Theraflu, emergen-c, DayQuil… all fail, all futile… STREPTOCOCCUS PNEUMONIAE… STREPTOCOCCUS PNEUMONIAE…”
So good. I admit it’s my own fault for not recognizing this sooner, but in my mind Danzig used to be this brutal lord of the darkness, and now he’s more like this goth Andy Rooney, demanding hot soup and raging against the tyranny of his home-owner’s association.
WELL I GOT SOMETHIN TA SAYEEE, I FEEL A BIT SNEEZY TODAY…
I CAN’T BELIEVE THE SOUP YOU BRING TO ME, YOU GOT SOME ATTITUUUDE…. IF YOU DON’T MELT THIS CHEESE, YOU’RE GONNA FEEL THE FLOOOR…