And Now, Some Important Questions About Dean Ambrose’s Drunken Deathmatch

It’s true what they say… you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s away shooting a movie.  

With Roman Reigns just sort of treading water and Seth Rollins doing monkey noises on Raw, we could really use Dean Ambrose back to liven things up and remind us that The Shield was basically the best thing ever.  But since he’s still on the set of WWE Films’ Lockdown playing cops and robbers, we here at WithSpandex are left to dig through the archives to bring you your Ambrose fix.  If you’re up to date on your indy wrestling stuff, you may have seen this.  If not, then oh man, I wish I could see your faces when you watch it. 

Ladies and gentleman, may I humbly present the Curt Hennig Drunken Taipei Deathmatch.  We take you now to the 2010 IWA Mid-South Prince of the Deathmatch Tournament, already in progress.

SO MANY QUESTIONS.

  1. What is his deal with blue jeans?  Does he get +5 on Fortitude saves for equipping them or something?
  2. Busch Light?  Really?
  3. Is “Sweet Caroline” the only Neil Diamond song he knows, or could he throw in a little “I Am… I Said” for good measure?
  4. Is he including his Combat Jeans when he says he has more title belts than he has pairs of pants?
  5. Why isn’t EVERYONE hip-thrusting at the “BA ba daaaaaaaa” part of “Sweet Caroline” yet?
  6. How much of the lyrics did he remember compared to the average Boston Red Sox fan?  (Calm down, I like the Sox.)
  7. How does this match even work?  Is it just “Take a shot every two minutes” or are there additional rules?
  8. How in the world did he end up losing this match to a guy named NEIL DIAMOND CUTTER?
  9. Who thought it was a good idea to mix alcohol and barbed wire in the first place?
  10. Remember when the comments section of this video was all CZW fans instead of Tumblr fangirls?