Are you excited for football to be back? Did you draft a good team? Is summertime just an endless wasteland of baseball and tennis and you writhing around, whining and waiting for ‘real sports’ to come back? I’d be willing to bet than any and all of your excitement is probably actually from this Fox Sports hype video with John Cena.
Come on, guys. Who isn’t jacked up after watching a pro wrestler shouting to an empty theatre, with a nameplate in the best House of Pain font the interns at Fox Sports could download?
The best part of all of this is the low-key WHAT’S A DEFLATE- AND/OR SPYGATE? vibe to all of it. Because who cares, right? That’s all on the other network. We have lights! We have screaming fans! We have action! We have still shots of these football players who don’t have anything to do with Tom Brady! I mean, it really does feel like that one Fawlty Towers scene, like the producer went up to him and said “Listen John, don’t mention Deflategate. I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it.”
The video makes a little more sense when you remember that Cena is from just outside of Boston, and is, of course, a huge Patriots fan. Though honestly, I’m kinda sad they didn’t take it further. Why not shoot it in an Irish pub? Why isn’t he drinking a Shamrock Shake? Why not just have Cena and Pat Patriot reenact that one beach scene from The Departed with Seth Wickersham and Don Van Natta lookalikes while the NFL on Fox theme plays in the background instead of Gimme Shelter?
Or….I guess we could all just chill and watch football. That’s cool too.