Grade-A level troll and hairpiece with eyes, Donald Trump, has officially announced on Tuesday that he will throw his hat into the 2016 presidential race. “I am officially running for President of the United States, and we are going to make our country great again,” he said in a speech at New York’s Trump Tower.
Trump — who has been saying for years that he’d be the best president ever — denounced U.S. foreign policy and said that he could help fix trade relations.
“Our country is in serious trouble. We don’t have victories anymore. When was the last time anyone saw us beating, let’s say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. When did we beat Japan at anything? They send their cars over by the millions, and what do we do?”
No word yet on if his hair arrangers will be a part of his proposed cabinet or if an actual cabinet full of hairpieces will be his cabinet. Meanwhile, NBC is reconsidering Trump’s position on Celebrity Apprentice.