10.17.07 10 years ago 24 Comments

Sad news today for the huge percentage of With Leather readers who are female fans masturbating to the NBA's male dance squads: Philadelphia's Broad Street Beefcakes have gotten a collective pink slip.

Destroying the tawdry fantasies of local women, and men, too, the Sixers have dismantled the Broad Street Beefcakes, a group of male dancers… Sixers spokesman Michael Preston says the team's "moving in a new direction," and will "implement several new elements" to in-house entertainment.

Now when I read the word "beefcake," I assumed the Sixers had a bunch of hunky guys with amazing dance moves like me, and I felt real empathy for the plight of the Beefcakes.  It's not easy for men to get by on raw sex appeal and dance moves these days.  But then I read a previous audition announcement for the team…


  • Must be 250+ pounds over the age of 21 years.
  • Must submit a full body shot (wide lenses highly recommended)
  • No previous dance training.
  • …and I realized the whole concept of the team was just fat people dancing poorly.  Which means it was the stupidest fuckin' idea in the world to begin with.  If I wanted to pay to see fat people jiggle I'd buy a plane ticket back to the Midwest.  The only job fat people should have is running on treadmills to power our electrical grids. 

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