Trump Trump Trump Trump. That’s basically been the news cycle (and all of our Facebook feeds) for the past three months. Oh look, Donald Trump said a racist thing! Oh look, Donald Trump is a jerk! Oh look, Tom Brady is Donald Trump’s friend! What a shocker! I can’t believe that a super rich megastar athlete personally knows another super rich person.
But enough about Tom Brady. This is about Donald Trump. Trump and football go way back. Trump was once the owner of the New Jersey Generals of the USFL. He wanted to own a football team so badly that he tried to force the USFL to stop playing games in spring and instead play in fall against the NFL in the hopes of forcing a merger. The plan did not work. If you’d like to know more, I’d suggest the excellent 30 for 30 on the subject. Trump never obtained ownership of an NFL team and hasn’t been able to secure it to this day. So, he killed one league to get into another, and failed anyway. Huh, maybe Trump is as good for football as he is for a presidential candidate.
Anyway, if he were my boss, he’d have already fired me for taking too long to get to the point, and for being a millennial liberal who makes art for the Internet. Time for Donald to finally get his wish: his name and face all over the NFL. I hope you are ready for a lot of hair jokes.