What Happened To Carmelo Anthony And Why Is He So Damn Skinny?

What is going on here? Why is everyone so damn skinny? This no-carb summer thing is out of control. First LeBron, now Carmelo? It’s a Goddamn epidemic. Somewhere, deep in the heart of a McDonald’s ball pit, Glenn “Big Baby” Davis is like how’d they do that you guys? And then he bit into his third Big Mac. And then he realized people were saying “no carb summer” not “all carb summer.” And then he kept on eating because that’s what fat people do.

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