CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Olivia Munn says Brett Ratner masturbated to her while eating shrimp

By | 33 Comments

Folks, we're about to go deep down a douche rabbit hole here, so fair warning.

brett ratner

Eddie Murphy in Talks to Host This Year’s Ratner-Produced Oscars

By | 24 Comments

A few weeks ago, I brought you the news that Rush Hour/Money Talks director <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/08/brett-ratner-to-crotch-fondle-the-oscars-nachos-for-everyone" target="_blank">Brett Ratner* will be producing</a> this year's Oscars telecast.

CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Brett Ratner to Crotch Fondle the Oscars – NACHOS FOR EVERYONE!

By | 6 Comments

Brett Ratner has been hired to co-produce this year's Oscars telecast, and the <a href="http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2011/08/05/brett-ratner-oscars-telecast-co-producer-is-ready-for-your-jokes/" target="_blank">first article</a> I read about it fittingly had the headline "Brett Ratner is Ready for Your Jokes.

ALAN ALDA

Brett Ratner finally made a movie about a black guy yelling inside a car

By | 12 Comments

Going against his normal strategy of staying attached to a project just long enough to impress people at <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/08/brett-ratner-joined-twitter" target="_blank">a Jonas Brothers concert</a>, Brett Ratner has actually directed a movie.

CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Was Brett Ratner gloating about X-Men?

By | 31 Comments

X-Men: First Class <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/06/fantasy-summer-box-office-standings-box-office-wrap-up" target="_blank">grossed $56 million</a> over the weekend, which is ridiculously good for the average film, but still the worst opening of any of the X-Men films.

ALAN ALDA

Oh thank God. Eddie Murphy joins Brett Ratner movie.

By | 22 Comments

I feel like I'm sweating red bulls and fondling my crotch to the beat of house music today, because Brett Ratner's hot new project just got more hotter.

CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Brett Ratner & Courtney Love are crotch-fondle buddies

By | 28 Comments

Here's a picture of Courtney Love and Brett Ratner last night at the premiere of Money Never Sleeps (Wall Street 2) in New York.

Brian Grazer

Brett Ratner to fondle bomb Ben Stiller in ‘Tower Heist’

By | 9 Comments

Seeing Ben Stiller get puked on and rehash decade-old jokes in the <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/08/little-fockers-trailer-2" target="_blank">Little Fockers trailer</a> was pretty sad.

CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Brett Ratner is a lady-man. Er, lady’s man.

By | 17 Comments

It's pretty obvious that any sexy lady would want to get her lady parts fondle bombed by the Rat man.

AMANDA SEYFRIED

Will Little Red Riding Hood bang a wolf now too?

By | 32 Comments

Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke's next project is a "gothic horror reimagining" of Little Red Riding Hood (Red Riding Hood) starring Amanda Seyfried, Julie Christie, Gary Oldman, and the recently cast <a href="http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2947254784/nm0001305" target="_blank">Lukas Haas</a>.

CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Marvel getting into the short-films market?

By | 22 Comments

A while back, <a href="http://www.chud.com/articles/articles/23473/1/EXCLUSIVE-MARVEL039S-EXCITING-SMALL-MOVIE-PLANS/Page1.html" target="_blank">CHUD</a> reported that Marvel was meeting with directors about smaller-scale movie adaptations of some of their second-tier characters (Really.

CROTCH FONDLEBOMB

Knight & Day’s Orwellian ads fail to convince public

By | 19 Comments

It hasn't ended up online yet, but if you've been watching the NBA finals or the World Cup at all in the last few days, you've probably seen the new commercial for Knight and Day that prominently features quotes calling it "FRESH" and "ORIGINAL," and painting it as the island of creativity in a sea of remakes and sequels.

brett ratner

Peter Jackson may protect Hobbits from Ratner’s crotch fondlebomb

By | 24 Comments

WB and MGM are the studios making The Hobbit, and aside from not actually having <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/05/the-hobbit-still-not-greenlit-guillermo-del-toro-still-not-bathing" target="_blank">greenlit it</a> and recently <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/05/del-toro-not-directing-the-hobbit-hates-new-zealand" target="_blank">losing the director</a>, everything is going fine.

BP

Kevin Costner solves the oil spill, forgiven for ‘The Postman’

By | 17 Comments

(You thought I was going to say 'Waterworld', didn't you.

BEN STILLER

It’s official: Tom Cruise to star in White Men Can’t Fatsuit

By | 13 Comments

Paramount has confirmed what we basically <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/06/i-told-you-idiots-not-to-encourage-tom-cruise" target="_blank">already knew</a>, that they're making a movie out of Tom Cruise's Les Grossman character.


Sign Up



Powered by WordPress.com VIP