John Kasich is still trucking along on the campaign trail by preparing for next week’s Wisconsin primary and the New York election coming later this month. Naturally, New York is a yuuge prize for any candidate, and Donald Trump likely has this one sewn up, not only because of his undeniable presence in the state but also because Ted Cruz previously dissed Trump by saying, “He embodies New York values.” Well, the Big Apple does not forget, and Cruz won’t be able to recover from that faux pas despite considering the state a “battleground.” Nor will Kasich score major points after stopping by Gino’s Pizzeria Thursday. He popped into the Queens eatery and did the unthinkable by stabbing at his slice with a fork.
Naturally, folks are crazy-upset about this abomination. All Kasich had to do was wait a few moments before the pizza cooled down, or maybe give a few quick puffs of air. What’s really sad, however, is that the media cares much more about this slip-up than how Kasich said some unsavory things about infant mortality at Thursday evening’s MSNBC town hall. Pizza grabs more attention than serious issues, but that’s what the people want in this election — a fine performance. And Kasich bungled this act by using utensils, but at least he’s not talking about women in kitchens again.
Don’t worry, there’s also evidence (at the bottom of this post) of Kasich wising up and picking up his slice. He got the message, and this flub goes perfectly well with his down-home reaction of acting befuddled when Cruz and Trump shout at each other. Kasich can be contradictory too, especially when defunding Planned Parenthood, which ran the domestic-violence programs that he praised only days earlier. So, it comes as no surprise that he pulled this telltale pizza move before telling CBS why he’s the perfect candidate for New York:
“I was just walking down the street and these people said, ‘This isn’t Trump territory — this is Kasich territory! I think New York is so dynamic, and somebody was saying this thing about New York values. I’ll tell you what New York values are for me: Excitement, innovation, change and time just flies when you’re here.”
At the MSNBC town hall, Kasich also spoke about how he loves New York Values, but he really likes that Rihanna song, which is an odd way of phrasing things.
By the way, Kasich also spoke with CBS to explain the pizza debacle, saying that the slice was “scalding hot, OK?” He further elaborated that his wife is really proud of him for learning how to use a fork. Again, this is what we care about in America — how a presidential candidate eats pizza.