This Hero Woman Got Drunk And Broke Into A Zoo To Pet A Tiger

There are very few things to do in Omaha, Neb. that will get your heart rate pumping. One of those things is getting hella drunk. The other? Breaking into a zoo to fulfill childhood dreams of petting a tiger. But just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should. That’s what one woman learned when she got inebriated as heck and then snuck her way into the local zoo, only to have her hand mauled by the tiger she thought she’d be friends with for life.

Death and Taxes reports that the woman, 33-year-old Jacqueline Eide, was having a grand old time on Halloween when she and a friend decided to waltz into the Henry Doorly Zoo and see what the animals were up to. Unsatisfied to just visit the monkey house or pet a reptile or two, Eide wandered over to the tiger enclosure where she happily got up close and personal with one of the giant cats that live there. Not understanding that tigers are wild animals who will eat your entire face if they had the chance, Eide decided to reach through the bars and give the tiger a friendly pet. It would have made a great story, except that the tiger wasn’t up for making friends. In return for her overture of friendship, Eide had her hand badly mangled. Like a boss.

Police were made aware of Eide’s plight when they were contacted by the local hospital where Eide had been transported after the attack. According to the official report, Eide began to display signs of aggression and belligerence shortly after her arrival. Whether that’s because the tiger bite really hurt (come on, though, a tiger) or because she thought she was turning into one (like zombies do, you know) is unclear, but what was immediately clear to officers is that Eide was intoxicated in some way. And that she had been bitten by a tiger.

Lots of questions here: One, how did Eide even get into the zoo? Two, why did she want to pet a tiger? And three, how much do you think a tiger bite really hurts? I’d wager a lot, but you’ve got to hand it to Eide for making her way through it and then having the energy to be aggressive toward others. No word on whether she’s been arrested, but the officers on the scene probably thought that being mauled by a wild animal was enough of a punishment.

(Via Death and Taxes)