Comparing girl to ‘Precious’ causes giant street brawl

If there’s one story I love writing up, it’s a story about full-figured ladies duking it out in the streets, pullin’ hair and throwin’ ham hocks.  And if perchance a titty should escape its lacy prison… (*kisses fingertips*) divine.  This time, it all started with a 13-year-old’s Facebook post showing another girl in a side-by-side picture with Gabourey Sidibe in Precious.  13-year-olds today, don’t they know it’s Friday, Friday?  They should be out partyin’, partyin’, YEAH!

A 13-year-old girl’s Facebook posting of another girl’s photo side by side with a large young actress’ photo erupted into a street fight on Madison’s southeast side Monday night, with upwards of 15 people, mostly teen girls and women, duking it out, police said.

According to the Madison Police Department, the fight was reported at 10:55 p.m. on Great Gray Drive, near McFarland, and apparently started when the girl who made the posting challenged the other 13-year-old girl to a fight, also through Facebook.

“Police found 10-15 people engaged in a physical confrontation,” said police spokesman Joel DeSpain. “Most were women, both teens and adults.”

Police said the fight participants scattered when squad cars rolled up, and various items were left in the street, including socks, rubber bands, hair ties, hair extensions, and a claw hammer.

Not to mention a turkey leg, three whopper wrappers, a box of taco shells, a shattered gravy boat, and two pairs of nunchuks.  Throw a burnt doll in there and take a picture, BOOM!  There’s your Pulitzer.

“The mother of one of the 13-year-old girls said it all started when the other girl began posting pictures of her daughter side by side with those of a heavy-set actress from the movie ‘Precious,’ ” DeSpain said.
“Derogatory comments also apparently were made about the 13-year-old girl,” DeSpain said. []

At least, the girl in question assumed the comments were derogatory.  It turns out she has full-blown AIDS, a retarded baby, and can’t read. Police are still investigating.