Mila Kunis & Macaulay Culkin Broke Up, Were Together

Mila Kunis and Macaulay Culkin have split up, their reps confirmed to the New York Post recently.  In an even more shocking development, Mila Kunis was dating Macaulay Culkin.  Sources say the relationship took a turn for the worse when Mila Kunis realized she had been dating Macaulay Culkin. Thanks, folks, I’ll be here all day, try the veal.  Whackety schmackety do!  Heeeey! So I hoid he refused to perform Kunilingus, and now he’s Home Alon— (*pie to the groin*)

Did Mila Kunis’ breakout role in “Black Swan” contribute to a breakup for the actress, who’s flirting with movie stardom? Kunis’ rep confirms that she and one-time child star Macaulay Culkin have gone their separate ways. “The split was amicable, and they remain close friends,” her rep said. Kunis started dating Culkin seven years ago, when she starred as the snobby “Jackie” character in “That ’70s Show.” A source said the couple split some time ago but has kept it low-key while Kunis promotes the movie. [NY Post]

Macauley’s going to get a hard time over this, but considering he’s a former child actor who used to hang out with Michael Jackson, just the fact that he’s never killed a family of boaters and tried to cut off his own penis in prison puts him ahead of the game.  Lights Camera Jackson should be so lucky.

Meanwhile, Black Swan is now responsible for Natalie Portman getting knocked up and Mila Kunis being single. …I guess it evens out?  They should film some more lesbian ballerinas, just in case.