Reese Witherspoon’s neighbors steamed over her loud ass

Probably my favorite thing about celebrities is that they’re always getting in ridiculous fights with their neighbors.  First it was Quentin Tarantino angry at True Blood creator Alan Ball, whose parrots were so loud Q-Ball could scarcely concentrate on fist-pumping.  Today it’s Reese Witherspoon’s neighbors, pissed about her loud miniature donkeys, Honky and Tonky.  Yes, Reese Witherspoon owns miniature donkeys.  TINA! COME GET SOME HAM!

Reese Witherspoon’s Ojai, Calif. neighbors are not happy about the noise level of her donkeys, Honky and Tonky. They hee-haw at such a high-volume that “they’re driving us crazy!” a source told Us Weekly.
“It’s so bad that a few residents have sent her a letter,” a local added. But the 35-year-old actress’ neighbors don’t want her to leave, just quiet down her donkeys! “She’s beloved here,” a neighbor said. “I’m not even sure she knows what’s going on.”
In an appearance on The Ellen DeGeneres Show in December, Witherspoon opened up about her farm full of animals. “This year we got donkeys. They’re really cute,” she gushed. “They’re actually miniature donkeys… They’re docile and sweet.”
“I [also] have two pigs, and I have three goats and I have 20 chickens and of course I have three dogs. And I have one horse. It’s hanging out with the donkey, it’s sweet,” she added. [USWeekly]

I like to imagine Reese riding up to a fancy dinner party at the country club on her miniature donkey, with a rooster in her purse and a frog dangling from a string on her rope belt, and she’s like, “Hey, y’all!”  And all the old snobs just grit their teeth and don’t say anything because they need her Legally Blonde money and are afraid of her dagger chin.  Then Johnny Depp steals a dinner roll and swings out the window on a chandelier, mugging for the camera, while Alan Ball’s minah birds squawk, “RAAAWK, HERE WE GO AGAIN. RAAAWK.”