FilmDrunk

This Week In Movie Posters: Jack Reacher, Madea, And The Dreaded Diagonals

This week in movie posters begins with Complete Unknown, from Joshua Marston (Maria Full of Grace), starring Michael Shannon. In posters, heads up looking towards the sun or horizon is generally code for “uplifting drama” or comedy, whereas looking at the ground usually means pensive psychological drama. It’s almost like he’s looking down at a puddle asking “Who am I?”

Anyway, I like the potted plant motif. Also, the fact that Michael Shannon’s natural resting face is a mask of barely contained inner turmoil makes designing his posters a lot easier.

So Michael Shannon is a plant and Rachel Weisz is… a collage? An origami? I’m not exactly sure what’s going on here. Also, whereas he looks pensive, she seems to be plotting revenge.

I’ve never watched one of these Madea movies. Based on the posters, I can’t imagine how they squeeze more than five minutes of content. It’s just Tyler Perry wearing different outfits, right? I imagine he looks at the camera every five minutes or so and it zooms in and he says “Hallelujer!” and the studio audience goes nuts. Are Madea movies filmed in front of a live studio audience? I assume so.

Oh hey, I almost forgot War On Everyone hadn’t come out yet. I saw it at SXSW, and its’ a nice companion piece to The Nice Guys. And yes, Skarsgard does that weird monkey walk for the entire movie. I didn’t realize it at the time, but now I have to wonder if he was practicing for Tarzan.

Here’s an interesting-ish design that tells me nothing. Couldn’t the shape in the middle at least be the silhouette of the scary thing? Throw me a bone here.

As I’ve said, 98% of all horror movies are either about a haunted house or a creepy little kid. I like that this one is using the actual house part of the haunted house as the scary thing. OH GOD, HERE COMES AN EVIL MOLDING!

This looks like Rob Zombie threw in every scary slasher movie trope — Clowns! Zombies! Nazis! Chainsaws! Knives! My question, where does the foppish dandy down there fit in? Also, a lady with “death” written on her sweatshirt seems like a particularly lazy attempt at scary. Does she also have a trucker hat that says “HORROR MOVIE?” I bet Judah Friedlander has one she could borrow.

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