Last night, someone named jetzzfan Tweeted that Will Ferrell was ushering a Lakers game, and that his name tag read “Ted Vagina.” Since I am a very serious journalist, I waited until this story had been confirmed by multiple sources (Deadspin, TMZ) and verified with pictures. In J-school, they call this the “pics or it didn’t happen rule,” and it’s printed on the inside of your blogging blazer.
The old style of fake name was a clever play on words, like Amanda Hugginkiss or Harry Johnson. These days it’s funnier eschew the pretense altogether, and go with something blatant, like Ted Vagina, or Chad Farthouse, or Reggie Hugewiener. Anyway, no one seems to know from whence Ted Vagina came or why, only that he escorted Shaquille O’Neal from the game at one point. Both Adam McKay and Judd Apatow tweeted the event as it was happening (both accounts from that jetzzfan guy, who only has 117 followers). Draw your own conclusions from that. At this point, it could be a movie-related stunt, or just Will Ferrell funnin’ around, which is more fun. In the business, we call this the “maybe someone else will know” rule. When he showed up at a minor league baseball game as “Rojo Johnson,” it seemed to be related to Casa De Mi Padre. Whereas his more recent Tim & Eric-ish Old Milwaukee ads appear to be something he does just because.
All I know is, last time I got expelled by a Vagina, I was crying hysterically and covered in poop and blood (*swings invisible golf club*).