5 Reasons Superman and Wonder Woman Doin' It is A Terrible Idea

So DC has finally pulled the trigger. They’re really doing it. Chuck Austen is giggling and clapping his hands somewhere.

Superman and Wonder Woman make sense outside DC continuity because, well, the basic physics dictate that neither of them exactly have a lot of sex partners who can take the abuse they’ll dish out. We’ve all read Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex, but that’s a two-way street. Consider that Wonder Woman’s enormous strength extends to her entire body.

Yeah, that’s a great way for your rod to become a twig, if you’ll excuse my work-safe euphemisms.

Nonetheless, inside DC continuity, it’s a terrible idea. Here’s why.

#5) Dammit, Brian Azzarello Doesn’t Need This $#!t

Azzarello has been doing a spectacular job on Wonder Woman, capping off a twelve issue run with a killer cliffhanger. And now DC editorial is throwing him this monkey wrench? Granted he can just ignore it since DC doesn’t seem prone to forcing lots of crossovers, but it’s still a crappy thing to do to a guy who has salvaged one of your biggest characters with the single best run she’s had in decades.

#4) So, Supes Is a Dick Now?

I freely admit I haven’t enjoyed how DC has been characterizing Superman this go-round, to the point of largely avoiding the books aside from Supergirl. In large part he’s a whiny douche, when he’s not being a self-righteous douche.

Part of what made Superman appealing is that he’s not human, but he genuinely wants to be. He’s a god who would give up his godhood if he didn’t feel an intense obligation to use his powers for the betterment of all mankind.

Screwing a teammate seems distinctly out of character. It’s like the New 52 establishing Batman is nailing Catwoman on a regular basis; it was fun to joke about but on paper it seems a step too far.

#3) It Makes The Human Cast Members of Both Essentially Redundant

Lois exists, especially since the ’80s reboot, to ground Superman and tie him to humanity. Same with the cast at the Daily Planet. I’d complain more about Steve Trevor but Azzarello hasn’t featured him and he was always a blank anyway.

I think Wondy can deal with this better than Supes because her current book lays out that she’s noble and thoughtful of others to a fault. Supes… I’m not so sure.

#2) It’s Cheap Pandering

I’m sorry, it is. “We’ve been teasing it in out of continuity stories for years, and here it is! SUPERPORKING!” Granted this is not the worst of DC’s pandering, or attempts to pander. Anybody remember when Sue Dibny got raped because that’s totally what the fanbase wants?

There’s a difference between giving the fans what they want and pandering, DC.

#1) It Essentially Writes Both Characters Into a Corner, Romantically

I have zero objection to superheroes having sex lives. In fact I think DC could stand to have a bit more of it in their current books. By all means, have Wonder Woman and Superman see different people. I’m not a shipper.

That said… OK, so they’re two gods. Having sex. Not that I think Geoff Johns is incapable, quite the opposite, but let’s face it, it’s going to be really hard not to make their dating life boring. It’s not like either of them are going to cheat. They don’t have in-laws to deal with, really.

It just seems like an idea that’s going to sputter out and fairly quickly because there’s literally nothing to do with it beyond “Dur hur they’re boning.”

What do you think?