‘Real Housewives of Atlanta’: Who’s to blame for the pajama brawl?

Wow, that was some brawl, wasn’t it? I never really expected to see Kandi come completely unglued, but, as Cynthia points out, you do not mess with Kandi’s man, ever. Well, not unless you want to see her cut a bitch.

Kandi feels terrible about going completely ratchet ghetto crazy pants in front of her friends, so she decides to bring them all together, again (sans the muscle head guys) at a spa day in order to kinda sorta apologize. This is as close as you’re going to get to a group lobotomy session or a tie-down sedation seminar, so it’s a good call. Still, it doesn’t stop the fighting. 

Kandi halfway apologizes to Cynthia, who grudging apologizes for Malorie, but only if (if!) she actually hit Kandi. It’s not exactly a hug-it-out moment, and I’m not sure Kandi and Cynthia are ever going to be friends again. While Kandi did overreact (when people have to restrain you, and you’re saying things like “I’ma kill you!” you’re overreacting), I think Cynthia should have apologized a little more sincerely for waggling her finger in Kandi’s face. Since she was handing out apologies, she may have also wanted to cough up one for Peter, who wandered into the midst of the fight with his chest puffed out like a middle-aged carrier pigeon. He claims he was just trying to aid the flow of conversation, but mostly he seemed to me to just be trying to start something.

Other conversations were less successful. Phaedra whined about her tea bags to deflect some of the tension, then gave a long, drawn-out and weird apology for Apollo’s prison beating of Brandon. It was something about the heritage of black Americans, and maybe Martin Luther King, and an American eagle, and really, I lost track after a while. Kenya, of course, thought it was utter crap. I’m not sure what she expected. Maybe she was hoping Apollo would donate a rib, or let Brandon try to crack one of his, though I think that would just mess up Brandon’s hand.

While Kenya was furious with Phaedra, Brandon had already proven more forgiving earlier in the day. Even though he claimed his cracked rib was an “automatic felony” (um, maybe not when the guy handing it out is married to his legal counsel), he couldn’t file the police report because he cared too much about Phaedra’s kids. Yeah, right. I think Brandon just wanted to come across as a big, huggy, love bear on national TV, plus he wanted to make sure he keeps getting invited to “RHOA” parties where he may or may not get the snot beaten out of him.

The joke’s on him, of course, because NeNe made it clear that she believes Kenya and Brandon were at fault for the whole melee, and she didn’t want her bringing Brandon to any more events, ever. Kenya, of course, does not like being told what to do, so expect Brandon at a party near you soon! Kenya was entirely put out that Apollo wasn’t the one getting a smack down from NeNe, but given the crazy, dead-eyed monster look he had on his face, I have to think he was having some sort of prison flashback during the fight. I’m not even sure why he got into the middle of it, other than to remind himself of the good old bad old times. If nothing else, the brawl made me think that Apollo is a pretty scary guy under the right circumstances, and it may not be in anyone’s best interest to blame him for anything, ever, unless they have a really big security guard on their payroll.

While Porsha had the bright idea to leave the party when things got ugly, she’s still the lovable dim bulb she’s always been. Why do I know that? Because she’s auditioning for Kandi’s musical, which can’t end well. Given that some of the people at the open call didn’t sound all that bad to me and yet Kandi and her minions reacted as if they were having hot acid poured into their eardrums, I tend to think that Porsha’s audition cannot end well. But hey, maybe Kandi can write a very special role for her as a tree or a mailbox. Porsha will just be happy to be a real actress after all.

Who do you thinks was responsible for the brawl? Do you think NeNe was too harsh on Kenya? Do you think Kandi’s musical would be something you’d want to see? 

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