Ever since Time Out posted that salacious excerpt from Grace Jones’ new autobiography, I’ll Never Write My Memoirs, the Internet has been doing their best detective work in trying to crack the mysterious case of an unhappy “Doris” who seemed to have sold her soul for fame. In fact, the search for the real “Doris” has prompted the website from scrubbing the site clean of the mysterious pop star.
Here’s what was said before the wipe job.
With this one, who I will call Doris, I thought she was trying on other people’s outfits: she’s a baby in a closet full of other people’s clothes, a little girl playing dress-up, putting on shoes that don’t fit. I could see what she wanted to be when I watched her doing something when she started out that was starker and purer. Deep down, she doesn’t want to do all the dressing-up nonsense; she loses herself inside all the play-acting.
I look at Doris and I think: Does she look happy? She looks lost, like she is desperately trying to find the person she was when she started. She looks like really she knows she is in Vegas, now that Vegas is the whole entertainment world filtered through the internet, through impatient social media. I don’t mind her dressing up, but when she started to dance like Madonna, almost immediately, copying someone else, it was like she had forgotten what it was about her that could be unique. Ultimately, it is all about prettiness and comfort, however much they pretend they are being provocative.
Doris’ story may very well be a cautionary tale of every naive young woman from a small town with dreams of making it to New York/L.A., or it can very well [redacted]. Who knows. But despite the now edited excerpt, ‘net detectives are still wracking their brains over this because solving a mystery is more fun than finishing those TPS reports.
https://twitter.com/christinedavitt/status/641952318901063680
https://twitter.com/Section1223/status/641848157043851264
#whoisdoris – we all want to know Grace Jones 😂😂
— 𝗳𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗼 (@iamfabio) September 10, 2015
@AmazonCan It's obvious that Britney spears is Doris.She mentioned Gaga directly in that interview. Why would she call her Doris all of a
— TJ (@MissAfroMinga) September 10, 2015
@BougieLa I still wanna know who "Doris" is. My money is on either Lady Gaga or Britney Spears (since Britney wasn't named).
— 🇵🇷☭harmony(extremist weirdo)☭🇭🇹 (@harmonylollipop) September 10, 2015
https://twitter.com/lisa2bags/status/641981300170059776
Doris is definitely Lady Gaga. Rihanna, bless her Bajan heart, has never danced like Madonna in her life.
— Jaeda Laurez (@DarthJaeda) September 10, 2015
https://twitter.com/youngsinick/status/641951154319007744
Why isn't #WhoIsDoris trending along with that Grace Jones article?!! I was thinking Britney Spears
— Beyoncé’s Renaissance Disco Horse (@tee_to_the) September 10, 2015
https://twitter.com/cmajaski/status/642010742946795520
https://twitter.com/lisa2bags/status/641981300170059776
And I think Doris is Britney Spears. // Grace Jones in this exclusive extract from her autobiography | http://t.co/h80QYpA27r
— Julie (@juliawb) September 10, 2015
https://twitter.com/ErikaSzeles/status/641996679818952704
