Combat Hospital (ABC) — Series premiere. I think that a show set in a Kandahar military hospital in 2006 could be an excellent addition to a canon that includes “M*A*S*H” and “China Beach,” but I doubt that this show is it (although it does rip off “China Beach’s” iconic silhouetted helicopter against a setting sun nicely). The annoyingly vague name is enough to turn me off — it’s like calling a war movie Military Unit — but others who’ve seen it call it “completely divorced from anything resembling real life” and “very ABC Family Channel.” I’ll pass.
Nail Files (TV Guide) — Series premiere. Apparently TV Guide has original programming now. This is about a docu-series about a Hollywood nail salon. Sounds riveting.
101 Ways to Leave a Game Show (ABC) — Series premiere. “Contestants are faced with a series of multiple-choice questions: Answer incorrectly, and they’re eliminated from the show by a number of over-the-top ejections, like being flown away strapped to a plane’s wing or dragged underwater by a one-ton anchor.” [Yahoo]
16 & Pregnant (MTV) — Season finale. I suppose it would be perverse if I wished that “16 & Pregnant” seasons ended when the babies die of neglect. That’s why I wish they ended with Child Protective Services seizing the babies.
Hardcore Pawn (truTV) — Season premiere. Has anybody even seen a pawn shop in a nice part of town? When you’ve got bars on the windows and the only other businesses nearby are liquor stores and strip clubs, the “hardcore” kinda goes without saying.
Staten Island Cakes (We) — Series premiere. Finally, someone capitalized on the hot-button intersection of America’s love of shows about cake and shows about Italian stereotypes. I’m pretty sure Danger Guerrero pitched this as “Guido Cakes.”