ERSTAD TRIUMPHANTLY RETURNS TO L.A.
Is It Live?

LAST MINUTE DERBY WAGERING GUIDE

By 05.05.07

Let's be clear, I don't know as much about thoroughbred horse racing as I do about harness racing or rat baiting, but I do love to wager on animals.  That being said,  here is your superfecta:

  1. Street Sense (currently 4-1) — Isn't it "Street Smarts"?  Either way, my old History professor, who was a Panzer driver during WWII, told me never to bet against anything with the initials SS.
  2. Dominican (currently 20-1) — St. Thomas Aquinas came to me in a dream and told me this horse would Place.  He also told me I'm spending eternity in Hell.  Either I win some money and go down, or I have to sell my car and go to Purgatory.  Hmm, maybe I can buy a drink for St. Peter.
  3. Teuflesberg (currently 30-1) — This horse will be in the money, unless it's named for Tim Teufel.  In that case, when it gets to the second turn, it will boot a baseball.
  4. Curlin (currently 7-2) — Hey, you either have to put an apostrophe or the 'g', and for that you'll finish just off the pace.  In addition, you're named after a broom based sport that is not broomball, so that's going to work against you.

Now hurry to your local OTB counter, or not.  You could just drink mint juleps with tequila chasers like I am.  I hope the CPD understands that this confluence of holidays has forced me from the safety of Irish whiskey and takes that into account when I go streaking later. -KD

UPDATE: Two out four isn't bad, and you can direct all complaints to Jose Cuervo and Jim Beam.  Officially, Street Sense won, Hard Spun placed, Curlin showed, and Imawildandcrazyguy finished fourthA $2 Superfecta bet paid $29,046.40, and the blue book price for '91 Toyota Camry is much, much less than that.  Oh well, at least I'm not going to Hell . . . yet.


TAGSGAMBLINGKENTUCKY DERBY

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