“Suck For Luck” NFL Power Rankings: Week 2

By: 09.19.11

"Lower... lower..."

11. Cleveland Browns (1-1) – I don’t know how this team isn’t better. Oh yeah, because it’s in Cleveland.

12. Cincinnati Bengals (1-1) – I’m not saying that Andy Dalton is leading the Bengals to the playoffs this season, but whichever coach replaces Marvin Lewis is going to have some nice depth. Also, if I’m Carson Palmer, I show up this week just to ruin everything.

13. Denver Broncos (1-1) – If any groins can stay healthy, the Broncos could be decent. Maybe if John Fox calls it leprosy, Tim Tebow can work his healing powers.

14. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-1) – I watched yesterday’s game against the Vikings surrounded by Bucs fans and the opinion is almost universal – they hate Josh Freeman. Ah to be so spoiled.

15. Tennessee Titans (1-1) – You know how Adrian Peterson showed up to camp, worked hard, became the highest paid running back in NFL history and then performed like it? Chris Johnson is the opposite. Who had Week 2 in the “Titans fans booing Chris Johnson” pool?

16. St. Louis Rams* (0-1) – Again, I am predicting the Rams to win tonight. If not, plop them in the Top 10. But I think they’ll rebound nicely with or without Steven Jackson.

17. Pittsburgh Steelers (1-1) – Poor Ben Roethlisberger. He’s going to be mutilated behind that offensive line this season.

18. Oakland Raiders (1-1) – Darren McFadden looks phenomenal. If any of the receivers can step up (and I mean consistently), Jason Campbell might even look good, too.

19. Dallas Cowboys (1-1) – Felix Jones might be out until after the bye week, which means nothing because they don’t know how to run anymore. I loved the Tony Romo dramatics yesterday, too. He’s such an elite QB. *dismissive wank, tears tendon*

20. Chicago bears (1-1) – Jay Cutler may be sacked 100 times this season. Whoever thought that letting Olin Kreutz go was a good idea should get to play QB for a few snaps.

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