Urban Meyer Has Ruined A Child’s Life

I’ve often joked that the Florida Gators and their fans were the nouveau riche of college football, having a long history of being the distant 3rd in Florida’s “Big 3” until only recently coming into success and fame. And the joke grew funnier to me when Urban Meyer arrived and so many Gators fans acted like Steve Spurrier – the reason that they had any national pride at all – never existed. But I’m not putting all Gators fans under that giant umbrella, especially when a true fan like Jen Wiley exists.

Both huge Gators fans, Jen and her husband were married in 1996 and they had their first child, a bouncing baby boy, back in 2006. Because those years are so important to the University of Florida football program and its fans, they decided to honor their favorite team by naming their child Spurrier Urban Wiley. Call me a dick, but I kind of hope he goes to FSU.

“My husband and I got married in 1996, when Spurrier won the championships,” she said, “and then we conceived in 2006 when Urban Meyer won the championship.”

It was a seemingly perfect fit for these Florida fanatics, until now. So mom’s ready for a change.

“I want to change his middle name,” she said.

(Via Bay News 9)

And what does she want to change his middle name to? Tim. As in Tim Tebow, our holy reptilian quarterback. It’s worth pointing out that this woman is from Florida but the child was born in Ohio. That’s like the ultimate double whammy.

What I really enjoy about the article, though, is that the husband’s name is never mentioned, almost as if he didn’t want this story about his child’s ridiculous name being told in the first place. But the real victim in this is poor Billy Donovan. Won’t some insane, overzealous fan name her child after the Gators’ national champion basketball coach? Maybe one day, Billy. Maybe one day.

(Hat tip to Kegs and Eggs.)

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