@Storytime: The Time Renzo Gracie Batmanned Two Muggers And Live-Tweeted It

If you weren’t aware, MMA fighter Renzo Gracie is a Gracie Barra Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belt and a two-time ADCC Submission Wrestling World Championship gold medalist. He is not the guy you want to mug on a Thursday night in New York City.

Unfortunately that’s what happened, allegedly, and Renzo added insult to the injuries you assume he dished out by live-blogging the entire thing on his Twitter account, @Renzo_Gracie_BJJ. I say “allegedly” because the tweets are thorough but don’t provide a lot of context, so depending on your point of view, one of two things happened:

1. Renzo foiled an attempted mugging by being a jiu-jitsu bad-ass. He incapacitated one of the muggers, humiliated him and got a picture on his phone before chasing down the second guy, putting the fear of God in him and heading home unharmed. This version makes Renzo look like real life’s Batman, dishing out justice to street thugs with extreme prejudice. At some point you expect him to shoot a grappling gun at the sky and zip away.

2. Two guys on the street asked Renzo for a cigarette. He responded by beating the shit out of them for no reason. He even drove his car around the block to find the guy who’d run away, choked him out three times, punched him in the eyes while he was unconscious and blogged the entire thing on his Twitter like a proud, psychopathic creep. If you need a Christian Bale reference for this one, it’s like that scene in American Psycho where Patrick Bateman pretends like he’s gonna help a hobo before berating and stabbing him to death.

I’m not sure which direction I lean. I want to trust Gracie’s word that they were gonna mug him, in which case sure, beat them within an inch of their lives for f**king with the wrong Brazilian. At the same time, his early tweets reveal that he’s pretty excited about beating the hell out of two random dudes, and never includes any important facts like “after asking me about a cigarette they pulled a gun” or anything. Just UNHOLY VIOLENCE and WHISPERS ABOUT DEATH to random strangers.

Check out the story yourself and make the call. I’m gonna go a head and side with Gracie, in the event the he ever sees this, drives to my house and starts trying to “raccoon” me.

[h/t to Cage Potato]

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