It’s Secret Santa season, the time of the year when you’re forced to buy cheap “holiday” presents for your fellow office workers because a memo from the Powers That Be tell you to. It’s a wonderful strife…going on in your head because it’s likely that you hate many of the people you work with (HI DANGER AND DUSTIN), but you still have to give them something. But rather than begrudgingly purchasing an iTunes gift certificate for the third straight year, or another item they’d actually enjoy, a much better option is to buy them a present that slyly shows what you actually think of them. In other words: that you abhor them.
Here are 10 such last-minute, $15-or-less options.
“Murphy Brown”: The Complete First Season ($12.34)
What This Gift Says: “I hear you love “The Office.” Yeah? Then you’ll adore the first season of the original workplace comedy, “Murphy Brown.” You can thank me later.”
Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives: An All-American Road Trip…with Recipes! by Guy Fieri ($13.59)
What This Gift Says: I find you extremely loud and obnoxious and believe you would feel very comfortable following the advice of another extremely loud and obnoxious person. Also, you’re fat.
Regis Philbin: My Personal Workout [VHS] ($3.36)
What This Gift Says: You’re REALLY fat, and need advice on how to lose weight from a senile old man (and Gelman). You also likely still have a VCR.