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Poor Beyonce Has To Wear Tight Clothes. Let’s Feel Sorry For Her.

By / 01.28.13

As you may have heard, Beyonce Knowles is directing a movie that’s about Beyonce Knowles talking about Beyonce Knowles and the hard, hard life Beyonce Knowles has to experience with her millions of dollars and her superstar husband. But it’s not always easy for Beyonce Knowles. Did you know, for instance, that Beyonce Knowles’ wanted to trademark her baby’s name, but a judge wouldn’t let her, which means that she won’t be able to properly exploit Blue Ivy? Or did you know that some parents — IRRATIONAL, STUPID PARENTS, OBVIOUSLY — got upset with her when she and Jay Z rented out an entire floor of a hospital to deliver Blue Ivy, keeping some parents from visiting their newborns in the ICU. Also, Beyonce had to take to Instagram to comment on her lip-synched performance of the National Anthem last week at President Obama’s inauguration.

See, the thing about being Beyonce Knowles — as she’ll tell you in the documentary she made about herself — is that Beyonce Knowles is a “human being” who cries and gets nervous just like everyone else. Also, it’s “very difficult” when her handlers put her in tight clothes to hide her pregnancy, and OHMYGOD, what is she going to do when she’s two days away from a live performance and she’s not yet prepared?

Woe is Beyonce Knowles, y’all. Woe is her. Check out the trailer for her HBO Documentary, Beyonce.

I will say this about Beyonce: There’s no such thing as a bad Beyonce GIF.


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