What’s On Tonight: That Time Carrot Top Was Billed Higher Than Brienne of Tarth

The Story of Frozen: Making a Disney Animated Classic (ABC, 8 p.m.) — I don’t disagree about the fact that Frozen is an animated “classic,” but it’s a little too early to anoint it as such, isn’t it? Give it maybe a decade before we start calling a movie a classic. Anyway, maybe they’ll tell the story about how Prince inadvertently contributed the line “the cold never bothered me anyway” to “Let It Go.”

19 Kids and Counting (TLC, 9 p.m.) — Yes, it is the kind of night where this show rises to the level of a highlight. There’s a wedding! Also, the Duggars are horrible, morally reprehensible people.

Below Deck (Bravo, 9 p.m.) — It’s an upstairs/downstairs premise set on a yacht. So, it’s like Downton Abbey with a lot more vomit and seasickness.

Houdini (History, 9 p.m.) — PART 2. Sh*t! I missed Part 1. Was it any good? I am rooting for Adrian Brody, but not enough to actually watch unless I know it’s worth the time.

Hard Knocks: Training Camp With The Atlanta Falcons (HBO, 10 p.m.) — How many of you drafted fourth-string Devonta Freeman in your fantasy drafts based almost entirely on what you saw of him in Hard Knocks? Smart move. He’ll be RB1 by November.

60 Minutes Sports (Showtime, 10 p.m.) — I hadn’t realized that Showtime had developed their own sports newsmagazine. Cool. Tonight’s episode will explore Peyton Manning’s neck surgery.

LATE NIGHT LISTINGS: Carrot Top and Gwendoline Christie are on Ferguson AND CARROT TOP IS BILLED FIRST. WTF? This is a travesty. Someone call CBS. Voice your complaints! This is an injustice! THIS CANNOT STAND. Also, Luke Wilson is on Dave; Adam Levine is on The Tonight Show; Eva Longoria is on Kimmel; Stephen Colbert is on Seth Meyers, while Mandy Patinkin is on Colbert, and Allison Janney is on Conan.

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