I actually kinda felt bad for George Lopez when I heard that TBS was canceling “Lopez Tonight.” Then I watched some of his final monologue, and I didn’t really feel so bad any more. There’s two minutes of applause followed by a joke about Obama’s racial heritage followed by four minutes of stuff I didn’t watch. Apparently he does a fair amount of swearing here, which, to be fair, is probably what I’d do if it were my last night on television, too. I wouldn’t want to rely on the standard 4-letter words, though. I’d just work phrases like “finger blast moist holes” and “five-gallon semen jug” into the monologue. I think that would be a lot more rewarding. More memorable, too. Once you’ve pictured five gallons of semen in your head, you’re not likely to forget it.
George Lopez's Final Monologue
Dan Seitz 05.22.17 18 hours ago
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