Culture

Carly Fiorina Falls Offstage And Ted Cruz Doesn’t Seem To Notice

When Ted Cruz announced Carly Fiorina as his presumptive vice-presidential nominee, the alliance was treated with amusement because (mathematically) Cruz stands no chance of catching up to Donald Trump. Why is Fiorina joining a losing ticket that doesn’t even exist yet? Cruz seems to relish his role as the disliked candidate who may be a little more likeable than Trump. Yet no one can quite decide which modern-day villain the Zodiac Killer embodies (or looks like), but even the Satanic church doesn’t want the guy.

Why Fiorina has joined this team shall remain a mystery, especially after she accused Cruz of being a liar and said he lacked “honor” while interacting with President Obama in the lead up to the 2013 government shutdown. But Cruz’s cheerleader seems motivated by her distaste of Trump, which stems from him attacking her looks and continuing to belittle her until she dropped out of the race following the Iowa caucus. Fiorina simply appears to tolerate Cruz, which is how many Republican voters feel these days.

The above video is the perfect embodiment of the Cruz-Fiorina alliance. She introduces him at an Indiana rally. He and his family pop into view, and Fiorina promptly falls off the stage. Cruz is in handshake mode and doesn’t notice at first, but then he looks straight toward his hopeful VP nominee and continues to work the crowd. Fortunately, Heidi Cruz is there to bring attention to the minor crisis at hand, and a gentleman springs forward to help Fiorina back onstage. Whew.

×