Trump Has Reinstated ‘The War On Christmas’ Because ‘People Don’t Talk About It Anymore’

Donald Trump spoke at the Values Voter Summit on Friday, the annual conservative political conference held in Washington D.C. that traditionally stands in opposition of reproductive and LGBT rights, so he knew exactly how to perform for this audience. Perhaps to distract from, say, other issues, Trump promised the cheering crowd that he would end attacks against Christian values, and then he went full hog and restarted the damn “War on Christmas.” This, of course, began as a Fox News talking point in the early-aughts and rumbles every time Starbucks does a red cup around the holidays or something.

“And something I’ve said so much over the past two years [Arrested Development narrator voice: he hasn’t], but I’ll say it again as we approach the end of the year. You know we’re getting near that beautiful Christmas season that people don’t talk about anymore,” Trump declared, incredibly inaccurately — as your local CVS or Rite Aid likely already has Christmas displays out and it’s not even Halloween yet.

“They don’t use the world ‘Christmas’ because it’s not politically correct,” he continued. “You’ll go to department stores and they’ll say ‘Happy New Year’ or they’ll say other things, it’ll be red, they’ll have it painted but they don’t say– well guess what, we’re saying Merry Christmas again.” As the crowd cheered him on, Trump gave himself a hearty thumbs up. So be on high alert America: the War on Christmas is officially game on, according to the president.

Naturally, Trump’s latest distraction immediately became the subject of contempt and ridicule on Twitter:

Better than North Korea, anyway.