Afternoon Round Up

Senior Editor
07.08.10 27 Comments

Here’s Malibu’s Most Wanted, Jeremy Piven explaining his totally-not-bogus-sounding mercury poisoning story to Peter Travers of Rolling Stone, who totally doesn’t seem like a giant kiss-ass the whole time.  And then at 6:33, Peter Travers asks J-Piv to sing, but J-Piv raps instead because “that’s what I grew up on.”  Woof.

Here’s a new clip of Angelina Jolie in Salt.  You’ll never believe this, but she plays a street-wise spy on the run from a government that may have double crossed her, and she’ll need all her skills to survive.  Hmm, are we sure America is ready for a film like this?  It seems ahead its time. |Yahoo Movies|

Mel Gibson hates Mexicans now too.  “I will report her to the f**king people that take f**king money from the wetbacks,” is what he reportedly said this time.  “MIRA, THERE’S ESOMEONE DRESSED LIKE UNA PEEG?” the ranchero accordion store manager reportedly said upon hearing Mel’s report.  More importantly, The Mighty Fek’lhr just made this new LOL Mel which I found delightfully disturbing. Yes, the crazy eyes are strong with that one. |HuffingtonPost|

Rumors of Bond’s demise have been greatly exaggerated.  Sort of.  Daniel Craig and Sam Mendes say they remain “attached to the project“, though that doesn’t mean a whole lot until MGM can actually make the movie. MGM is in debt and needs a buyer, and Bond remains tied to MGM because MGM kind of needs it to attract a buyer. So basically, it’s on hold indefinitely until someone buys MGM, just like it had been.  I hear rumblings about someone looking to buy MGM, but nothing concrete yet. Hold on, I hear another rumbling… (*fart noise*)  [Deadline]

Some new kid I haven’t heard of has been cast as Beast in X-Men First Class. You can read all about it in my upcoming book, “Blah Blah Blah Who Cares.” |SlashFilm|

Janeane Garofalo says Brazilian waxing is part of a “national myth.” (Obvious line: in related news, Janeane Garofalo is still alive.)  “It couldn’t possibly be true that there are a lot of guys who find adult females with genitals that look pre-adolescent that attractive,” she said. “If they do, that’s a problem. I think it’s a national myth that we have all gone along with for some reason.”  You’re right, Janeane, I have fascist, pedophilic tendencies because I also prefer pre-adolescent-looking armpits, legs, eyebrows, and upper lips, and I even like it when women wear deodorant so that they can smell like my marginalized, objectified, pre-adolescent playthings.  But hey, you know what’s not a national myth? Janeane Garofalo has a super hairy p*ssy.  |Celebitchy|

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