Breck Eisner Will Direct Jaden Smith In ‘The Karate Kid 2: Daddy Bought Me This’

It has been almost four years since Jaden Smith starred as Dre Parker in The Karate Kid, so if you were feeling pretty safe and confident in that film being a one-time thing, you can stop and go back to hating everything again. According to Variety, Sony has inked Breck Eisner to direct The Karate Kid 2, which will once again star Smith as the boy whose parents really want to be an action movie star. Why Sony didn’t get Harald Zwart to return as director is known only to the studio, but I’ll assume that it’s because he’s so wrapped up in keeping the hilariously bad Mortal Instruments franchise alive.

As for Eisner, he has previously directed The Crazies and Sahara, so telling Will Smith’s kid to punch and kick on cue should be a walk in the park. The hard part will be relying on the movie’s brand to help dig Smith out of the ashes of the flaming diaper pile that was After Earth, but seeing as The Karate Kid grossed $359 million worldwide, this one should at least double the film’s budget. We can only cross our fingers and hope that this one is less about a kid learning Kung Fu (which isn’t karate) and more about him finding the same sort of enlightenment that Smith has found on Twitter.

For example:

Yeah, school is for suckers (who don’t have parents worth half a billion dollars)!

Why does he capitalize the S in relationship? Because it’s like a rocket that takes us to the moon of our minds.

Dibs on Cthulhu!

Respect your haters and they will be forced to respect themselves, or they will have to simply check themselves before they wreck themselves.

I don’t get this one. Does anyone get this one?

There you have it. Rob Kardashian can play Buddha.