The Marvel Cinematic Universe contains multitudes. So special, so chocked full of marketing for films we’re not yet watching, The MCU has been the cinematic version of the Ron Popeil method, “But wait, there’s MORE!” I don’t know about you, but I can’t get enough. I love learning about new movies and potential offerings for me, the consumer.
A few notes on these rankings, because I know y’all can be sticklers for deets:
1) I only included the MCU films, not the X-Men or the like. If you don’t know what the MCU is I just feel bad for you. You were probably picked last to play MCU rankings as a kid.
2) This is probably incomplete. Between Post-credit and Mid-credit scenes, who the hell knows what goes where anymore. I mean, I did my due diligence, but I still have a pretty active meth habit to feed.
3) There seems to have been a fake Spider-Man one leaked for one of The Avengers films. I didn’t include this one, because I only deal in totally legit end-credit scenes. Don’t bring that wack fake stuff in here.
Which of these post-credits scenes have been the least awful? And which have been full-on nightmares? Let’s count them down!
13. Iron Man 2
In this scene a guy finds a Hammer. That’s the scene. Evidently we’re supposed to crap our pants and say, “DAT’S THOR’S HAMMA!” This is the worst one by far.
12. Incredible Hulk
There’s not a great copy of this online, likely because everyone would like to forget it ever happened. I mean, think about it, Hulkster was the only one to lose his franchise like a little B. Iron Man, Cap, T’hor, they all kept rolling on the river while Hulk got thrown into ensemble pieces. In this post-credits scene Tony Stark tells some rando that they are putting a team together. Yeah, no kidding. Thanks for repeating what Nick Fury already told me in the post-credits scene for Iron Man, you fool. Tony Stark seems to be a gossip of the highest order, he just strolls around telling people things Nick Fury already told him. Speaking of …
11. Iron Man
Back in my day, they used to just throw Sam Jackson into all post-credits scenes because he was available at a moment’s notice. In this classic he tells Tony Stark they are putting a team together, and I don’t mean the Brooklyn Dodgers if you get my drift. He’s talking about Los Avengers. Anyway, this scene doesn’t have the normal Marvel patina because they were still figuring out the whole post-credits game. Think of this one like a lovable scamp learning about the organ trading business for the first time.
10. Captain America: The First Avenger
There seems to be a period where Nick Fury was just telling everyone in person about The Avengers. This was another one of those. Why he couldn’t send out an email blast or maybe ask an assistant to do the dirty work? Well, the last time he sent someone not named “Nick Fury”, the guy called him to tell him about a hammer. Once bitten, twice hammered, I say. In this one Nick Fury tells Captain America they are putting together a team. You guys, A TEAM!
Oh dear Lord, this is when I realized they call some of them “mid-credit” scenes and the others “post-credit” scenes. THAT SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE. You can’t make up something called a mid-credit scene just so you can get your jollies. Anyway, I only made it through 15 seconds of the above video before I punched myself in the jejunum, but I remember the scenes well enough to rank them 8A and 8B. First up, the mid-credit scene where Evangeline Lilly finds out her dad made her a suit too. She’s going to become Wasp? I’m not totally familiar with the character, hopefully she is. In the second scene Captain America is talking to Falcon about getting a “guy” to help. That’s “Ant-Man”, he’s the guy. This is a REAL scene from Captain America: Civil War, coming to a theater near you in 2016.
8. Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Another one with two scenes, including the dreaded Mid-Credits scene, a look at Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch who will pop up in Avengers: Age of Ultron. It’s a pretty typical scene, just a little tease/fluffer situation. They also take a gander at The Tesseract, one of the “Infinity Gems”, which literally translates to “TEASER ACT”.
The other scene is better because it’s Bucky, the most underrated character of the MCU. I know the following things about Bucky:
1) He used to be a friend to the Cap
2) He has a metal arm
3) His name is Bucky.
4) His haircut reminds me of that kid from The Mighty Ducks.
Love that guy.
7. Thor: The Dark World
Here’s where they tease Guardians of the Galaxy with Benicio Del Toro. Would have been cooler if he was playing his character from The Usual Suspects. He flip you. Flip you for real.
6. Iron Man 3
I mean, it’s mildly amusing to have Robert Downey’s Tony Stark talking with Mark “Mozzarella” Ruffalo as if he’s a therapist. I can’t all the way hate it, and one could claim it’s not even really even a teaser, because it’s not like the next movie was about therapy.
5. Guardians of the Galaxy
You think I’d have this one ranked higher, because it was an attempt at levity, but I’ve gotten so burned out that even Howard the Duck can’t rouse me. Now, if they’d included Alf …
More Tesseract talk (great name for an NPR show, btw) but this time Loki is involved. Here’s what I don’t quite get – was Loki controlling Erik Selvig here? If so, did that throughline continue in Thor 2? I’m not sure I actually care, but it might be fun for someone in the comments to get involved.
3. Marvel’s The Avengers?
I distinctly remember a Thanos scene at the end of Guardians of the Galaxy, but this is tagged under The Avengers? Regardless, it’s enjoyable because Ronan says, “They are unruly and therefore cannot be ruled”. Nice turn of phrase there, friendo. Are they unkempt and thus can’t be kempt? Or how about unbridled and therefore can’t be brides? The permutations are endless once you really stop to think about it.
2. Marvel’s The Avengers
You can tell here that Joss Whedon actively rolled his eyes at the very idea of an end-credits scene, and as it was the end of PHASE ONE OF THE MCU he could get away with not actively marketing. So he decided to hook up Shawarma restaurants everywhere. There’s so much to like here, the Shawarma place trying to clean up the disaster but still serving food, the gang eating in silence, the complete lack of another film being mentioned. Known as “the Shawarma scene” in some circles, this one is talked about in the reverent tones reserved for actual art or libraries.
1. Thor: The Dark World
I’m breaking my own rule about ranking the Mid-Credits and Post-Credits from each movie together because this one is so enjoyable. First off, world-class cuties Natalie Portman and Chris Hemsworth make out. And then a giant dinosaur romps through somewhere. Now look, I know there’s probably some reason for the dinosaur, like he relates to something or something else coming up, but I like to think of him as just a dinosaur from nowhere. He’s out there roaming free as people make-out with each other, totally unawares. That’s why this is my favorite end credits scene ever.
Laremy is on Twitter and loves movie tie-ins.