Memphis woman plans to marry a cardboard cutout of Edward Cullen

A Memphis woman is making headlines this week after announcing plans to marry a cardboard cutout of Twilight‘s Edward Cullen. See? I told you this would happen if we elected Obama.

“I’m definitely not used to this level of attention but I’m really pleased with it,” said Memphis College of Art graduate Lauren Adkins. “It’s been kind of a shock.”

You announced your wedding to a cardboard cutout and you say you’re enjoying all the attention? Nooo. Someone, please, revive me with smelling salts and fetch me a new monocle.

Adkins is making a big splash with her art project, her thesis for her masters at the University of Las Vegas.
“It’s a theatrical performance in which I’ll be marrying Edward Cullen,” Adkins said.
It will actually be a cardboard cutout of the lead character in the enormously popular Twilight movies, featuring vampire Edward Cullen. His cut out will be at the altar with Adkins at a Las Vegas Chapel. There will be guests and a reception. Just like a real wedding.

Ahh, so it’s a performance art piece. Somewhere, James Franco’s dicknose is half tumescent. Meanwhile, in a symbolic gesture, Adkins’ father plans to hold a competing ceremony, divorce proceedings him and $20 grand.

“She was always known to challenge female stereotypes when she was here so this is on a grander scale,” said Haley Morris-Cafiero, Memphis College of Art.
The wedding is performance art that has gone a bit haywire after the UK tabloids left out the fact that it is an art project.
“They are rewriting the story on their own volition to fit their perceived idea of this crazy female fanatic,” Adkins said.
The wedding is performance art with a social comment on how the media shapes people’s ideas.
Adkins said Edward Cullen represents an ideal many girls and women want of a protector. The character is inhumanly handsome, supportive, and possessive. [WMCTV]

Ahh, so it’s actually a comment on the media? (*farts into wine glass, inhales deeply, drinks fart, gargles, spits into own butt*) Yes, I’m sure we’ll never be able to look at Twilight the same way again, knowing Edward Cullen represents some kind of female ideal.

I like how they describe him as “inhumanely handsome.” So, what? His handsomeness kills animals?
[picture via LaurenAdkins]