Piranha 3DD Hates Your Vagina

Starring Christopher Lloyd as kooky scientist, Gary Busey as crazy guy who eats piranhas, Ving Rhames as black guy with guns for legs, and David Hasselhoff as David Hasselhoff, the trailer for Piranha 3DD appears below. The big question coming into this was whether the franchise would be able to soldier on without original director Alexander Aja under replacement John Gulager. The entire trailer consists of women getting either water or fish shot at their boobs, butt, and vaginas, so it looks like fears were unfounded. Unless you’re a vagina, in which case, be very afraid.

A lot of it is also shot from this “vag-cam” perspective, so assuming your local theater is equipped with the latest in 3D technology, you should be able to actually see the actresses ovulating. …What? Don’t tell me that’s not sexy, it’s a biological imperative.