Tarantino's Cocaine Wizard Won an Oscar! (With Full List of Winners)

Well the Oscars happened last night, and thanks to our

The first award of the evening went to veteran cinematographer Robert Richardson for Hugo (Richardson’s third), who may be more familiar to FilmDrunk readers as the wizard who appears when Quentin Tarantino does too much cocaine. Congratulations, Coke Wizard! Reached for comment, Richardson said, “Askwala Pasquala ishkabibble hazoo! It’s quite the wizard’s honor, to accept this from you!” and disappeared in a cloud of bong smoke. Someone turned over a rainstick.

Of course, the big story was The Artist, which won damn near everything it was nominated for, including Picture, Director, Actor, and Score. The backlash will be swift and noisy, I’m sure, but… eh. It seems so very precious and gimmicky and so Oscars that a silent movie from France would win best picture in 2012, but the movie itself… it was pretty good. Not life changing, but… cute. Better than The King’s Speech, Crash, Slumdog Millionaire, etc., certainly. Meryl Streep got the Best Actress trophy she so richly deserved for any number of prior films for that awful snotpile The Iron Lady, and immediately proved herself worthy by convincingly feigning surprise. What an actress! Anyway, things got pretty fuzzy for me after that. Last thing I remember was Jean Dujardin babbling something about “Doogloss Far Bonks.”

(List of winners below)

Best Picture – “The Artist” Thomas Langmann, Producer

Directing – “The Artist” Michel Hazanavicius

Actor in a Leading Role – Jean Dujardin in “The Artist”

Actor in a Supporting Role – Christopher Plummer in “Beginners”

Actress in a Leading Role – Meryl Streep in “The Iron Lady”

Actress in a Supporting Role – Octavia Spencer in “The Help”

Writing (Adapted Screenplay) – “The Descendants” Screenplay by Alexander Payne and Nat Faxon & Jim Rash

Writing (Original Screenplay) – “Midnight in Paris” Written by Woody Allen

Animated Feature Film – “Rango” Gore Verbinski

Art Direction – “Hugo” Production Design: Dante Ferretti; Set Decoration: Francesca Lo Schiavo

Film Editing – “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” Kirk Baxter and Angus Wall

Cinematography – “Hugo” Robert Richardson

Costume Design – “The Artist” Mark Bridges

Documentary (Feature) – “Undefeated” TJ Martin, Dan Lindsay and Richard Middlemas

Documentary (Short Subject) – “Saving Face” Daniel Junge and Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy

Foreign Language Film – “A Separation” Iran

Makeup – “The Iron Lady” Mark Coulier and J. Roy Helland

Music (Original Score) – “The Artist” Ludovic Bource

Music (Original Song) – “Man or Muppet” from “The Muppets” Music and Lyric by Bret McKenzie

Short Film (Animated) – “The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore” William Joyce and Brandon Oldenburg

Short Film (Live Action) – “The Shore” Terry George and Oorlagh George

Sound Editing – “Hugo” Philip Stockton and Eugene Gearty

Sound Mixing – “Hugo” Tom Fleischman and John Midgley

Visual Effects – “Hugo” Rob Legato, Joss Williams, Ben Grossman and Alex Henning

Banner Picture via IMDB, Dujardin via Helga Esteb / Shutterstock.com.