Most people recall the character of TV’s Steve Austin as The Six Million Dollar Man; an astronaut who, following a crippling aircraft crash, would be rebuilt as a cyborg who was better, stronger…faster. Of course, if you happen to be my younger cousin, the name Steve Austin is then either associated with A) that 3:16 wrestling dude -or- B) that guy Kevin Smith talks about in An Evening with Kevin Smith 2: Evening Harder. So, in a sense, I guess my little cousin isn’t a complete dolt.
But it’s true, back in 1995 Kevin Smith was tapped to write a feature adaptation of The Six Million Dollar Man, a project that, surprisingly enough, didn’t ever actually end up getting made. Skip ahead sixteen years later and suddenly it seems that Smith’s shelved screenplay may soon be getting rebuilt itself.
From Smith’s never ending Twitter account:
Okay: remember that SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN script I wrote years ago? Someone’s taking that dead script & turning it into a live comic. I won’t say who it is… but it’s not their first time. [BleedingCool]
Wait -that’s it?! No 13,067 character-long explanation for why the dick jokes have parted and allowed Steve Austin’s corpse to ascend from the heavens? Okay fine, suit yourself. Surprisingly enough, at one point Chris Rock was attached to the project, but who knows what’s in store for this “live comic”.
For everyone else still scratching their brainstems right now, I’ve attached video, after the jump, from Kevin Smith’s above mentioned An Evening with Kevin Smith 2: Evening Harder, in which he talks about how hard it was trying to write the script for the project.
The Six Million Dollar Man screenplay at the 1:38 mark: