Jaden Smith’s Twitter has brought us plenty of joy over the years – the void he left in our lives when he quit the service from May 2 to June 29 was enormous. People have placed his tweets into movie posters and Garfield comic strips, mostly because they’re just so funny. Today, on Jaden’s 17th birthday, let’s look at seven of his most off-the-wall tweets and see if we can’t figure out just what he was talking about.
How Can Mirrors Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't Real
— Jaden (@jaden) May 2, 2013
Wait, where did he come up with that idea that our eyes aren’t real? Is he talking about glass eyes? Or contacts, maybe? Meh, if this were a Yes lyric, I probably would have thought it was profound when I was 15, so I’ll cut him some slack.
School Is The Tool To Brainwash The Youth.
— Jaden (@jaden) September 12, 2013
I didn’t like going to school as a kid, either. The first response to this tweet wins the day: they *do* teach capitalization in school, though. I’m curious to see if he’ll stand by his anti-school stance or if he’ll end up at an Ivy League school in two years. I’m even more curious to see how he’ll deal with a school-hating teen when he’s a father. Will he be a parent that just doesn’t understand?
"It's Your Birthday" Mateo Said. I Didn't Respond. "Are You Not Excited To Be 15" He Asked. Reading My Book I Uttered "I Turned 15 Long Ago"
— Jaden (@jaden) July 9, 2013
This is how Jaden reacted to his 15th birthday two years ago. No word how long ago he turned 17. Maybe rich kids just age faster?
Water In The Eyes And Alcohol In The Eyes Are Pretty Much The Same I Know This From First Hand Experience.
— Jaden (@jaden) March 4, 2014
Not to question the experiences of a teenager (no, we’d never ever want to do that), but I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t test out Jaden’s theory. Pretty sure science isn’t walking with him on this one.
If Everybody In The World Dropped Out Of School We Would Have A Much More Intelligent Society.
— Jaden (@jaden) September 13, 2013
Okay, we get it dude, you don’t like school. I don’t think we’d be better off if all the kindergartners in the world dropped out, though. Especially if they were to flood the service industry job market. Because what’s a kindergartner going to do during the week if he or she isn’t eating paste in art class? Bagging groceries with little hands and stealing jobs from hard-working 20-year-olds who refuse to get paid in animal crackers and extra long nap times, that’s what.
If Newborn Babies Could Speak They Would Be The Most Intelligent Beings On Planet Earth.
— Jaden (@jaden) September 12, 2013
I’m just going to assume Jaden saw Stewie on Family Guy and thought it was a documentary.
Why Is It Always 3 WHY IS IT ALWAYS 3!!!!!
— Jaden (@jaden) September 29, 2013
No clue.