Music

Lil Nas X Spoke About Battling Depression And Suicidal Thoughts While Detailing His Rise To Fame

Lil Nas X’s rise to fame was a quick and momentous one, with one major record-breaker: “Old Town Road,” his break-out, spent 19 consecutive weeks atop the singles chart. The track would later become the most-certified song in music history, going 14x Platinum. But getting there wasn’t easy. In a series of TikTok videos, Lil Nas reflected on his rise to fame and what his life has been like post-“Old Town Road.”

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In a series of four videos entitled “Life Story,” Lil Nas X opened up about his battle with depression and other struggles. “In 2017 I became the first [in] my family to get into college,” the video’s caption read. “During college I was depressed, had no friends and…. my grandmother passed. I started going to the doctor a lot in fear that I would die soon… hypochondria. In May 2018, I started making music.” He then moved in with his sister and dropped his first mixtape, Nasarati, in June 2018. However, things would soon take a turn.

“My sister kicked me out, my brother who was helping me left to the military, & my songs were no longer doing good,” he revealed. In the next two videos, he discussed releasing “Old Town Road” and having to find his own ways to promote the song due to financial struggles. He also spoke about signing to Columbia Records, working with Bill Ray Cyrus, coming out as gay, and making enough money to move into his first apartment and put his mom in rehab. Despite the improvements, he admitted that some additional hardships pushed him to the edge, making him contemplate suicide.

“I got news that my mom wasn’t doing so well in rehab with her addiction,” he wrote . “Also me and my boyfriend broke up. During this time old town road was still killing it while I was… spiraling. I found myself in a hotel room contemplating ending it all. But I didn’t.”

You can watch the TikTok videos above.

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