Bobby Valentine Is Actually Being Considered By Donald Trump To Be A U.S. Ambassador

Donald Trump on Twitter/Getty Images

Are you exhausted by Donald Trump news? Me too. I’m sorry to do this to you on a Friday, but this is newsy and involves sports, so we have to present this information. It’s more garden-variety stupidity than soul-crushing hate-mongering in the form of appointing white nationalists to cabinet positions, so we can get through this together.

Bobby Valentine may become an ambassador to Japan. I know, I know — this seems like a rushed joke by an unfunny person looking to mock Trump’s limited worldview and understanding of anything. And you saw my byline so that’s a fair assumption but this is a real thing that could happen.

Here are some words about this from WEEI, a real web site that specializes in real Boston-based news:

The former Red Sox manager has known both Trump and his brother, Bob, since the early 1980’s. He is also very close to Anthony Scaramucci, who is part of the Presidential Transition Team Executive Committee. And it was New Jersey governor Chris Christie who, according to a source, first surfaced Valentine’s name for the position.

The connections don’t stop there.

Valentine is still very popular in Japan, having managed the Chiba Lotte Marines for seven seasons, becoming the first U.S. born manager to win the Japan Series with a championship in 2005.

This is what happens if you put a buffoon who knows sports stuff and pop culture in charge of the world. Say if I were elected president and had to choose new ambassadors, here’s what I’d come up with:

Russia — Sergei Fedorov
Australia — Crocodile Dundee (not Paul Hogan; Crocodile Dundee)
France — Pepe Le Pew
Italy — Guy Fieri

I can’t even begin to imagine the ways having an ambassador to Japan that lacks political experience can help destroy the world. I’m sure we’ll find out.

(WEEI)