Anthony Bourdain 1, Guy Fieri 0

It’s not some great revelation that Anthony Bourdain is a better human being than Guy Fieri in every way. Bourdain spent three decades working in kitchens before writing an excellent bestselling book that paved the way for his TV show, a travelogue in which he exudes wit and a passion for other cultures. Fieri, on the other hand, achieved fame by winning a Food Network reality show on the strength of his hair product and shirts with flames on them.

So yeah, saying that Bourdain is better than Fieri is like saying that the Coen brothers are better than Michael Bay. Nevertheless, Bourdain only improved his stock by joking on Twitter about Fieri’s stolen Lamborghini:

• Hey, this Lamborghini I “borrowed” is a nice ride!

• But it smells like Ed Hardy in here.

• …and there are naked pictures of Howie Mandel in the glove. Ewww!

• A half eaten nori roll under the seat–and there’s bbq PORK inside! What kind of beast owned this thing!!!

• I probably shouldn’t have had that 5th drink. This is a lot of car…

• Gotta say–this thing handles well off the road!

By the way, that nori roll/barbecue pork joke is a dig at Tex Wasabi’s, a sushi/BBQ restaurant that Fieri opened in 2003. That’s bonus points for going beyond the easy jokes, plus street cred for joking about driving drunk. Is that dude cool or what? I wanna smoke opium in a Thai whorehouse with him.