Remember back in the good old days of Lorena Bobbitt? Times were so quaint in the early ’90s. Back then a woman cutting her husband’s penis off was a spectacle deserving of national attention, and nowadays stuff like that barely even registers a blip on the radar.
Take the story of this Chinese couple, of example. 30-year-old Feng Lung discovered that her husband, 32-year-old Fan Lung, had been sending sexy messages to a 21-year-old mistress, Zhang Hung. And how did she discover this? Oh, just because her husband had been using her cell phone to send them — so as a member of the fairer sex I can almost understand the insult to injury logic that resulted in what happened next. Via NewYorkPost:
The jilted wife went berserk, grabbed a pair of scissors, stormed into their bedroom and cut off his penis while he was sleeping. Lung was rushed to the hospital, where doctors were able to save the appendage and sew it back on.
Whew! That was a close one! Or it would have been, if you weren’t completely underestimating the pure, unadulterated f*cking fury of a woman scorned:
But Feng was able to sneak into the recovery room, where she chopped his penis off a second time and threw it out the window, according to CEN. A shocked Lung chased his wife outside, despite losing a lot of blood.
“Staff rushed out to see what was happening and found the patient with blood streaming down his legs hitting the woman,” a hospital spokesman said. “He was stopped and the woman was taken in for treatment, and then we discovered she had chopped his penis off again.”
Sadly, this penis was not recovered the second time, as authorities presume that a stray dog or cat mistook it for a cocktail weenie. Thankfully Ms. Hung, the other woman in the situation, was not put off, saying: “It doesn’t matter that he’s lost his fertility. He has five children already.” Glass half full, I guess? You might just see a horrifying ragged penis stump, but she sees free birth control. And she got the guy in the end. Win win!