Charlize Theron and Sean Penn Reportedly Got ‘Secretly Engaged’ Last Month

Us Weekly is reporting that Charlize Theron and Sean Penn had a super secret engagement in Paris back in November, and somehow we’re all just finding out about it now. According to an unnamed “source,” the couple who have been dating since December of 2013 have decided to “take their relationship to the next level.” Taking a relationship to the next level after eleven months can mean so many things, but supposedly this is the real deal.

This was no ordinary proposal, though. Theron, who has said in the past that she’s not the kind of girl who ever dreamt of a big wedding, is also not the kind of girl who needs a big diamond engagement ring. “There’s no ring, but they are committed,” the insider tells Us.

I don’t know. At face value I don’t want to buy this, and not just because there’s no ring. (Seriously, no ring? You’re millionaires, just buy a pretty ring so all us plebeians can ooh and ahh over it, for f*ck’s sake.) Charlize Theron has never been married despite a prior nine-year relationship with Stuart Townsend, and Sean Penn has been married twice — most recently ending his 14-year marriage to Robin Wright in 2010 to immediately start dating Scarlett Johansson — so he doesn’t seem like the ideal candidate to inspire a sudden 180 on marriage.

Who knows. Us Weekly was right when they called the engagement between Cameron Diaz and the dude from Good Charlotte, so I guess whatever sorcery they’ve got going is working.